On the regret thing, we don’t know what the future will hold for individuals or collectively. Yes, things aren’t looking good overall. But what if your kids make massive positive changes to the world as they grow up? (And from what you’ve said they are heading in a good direction for this.)

I totally understand how some people feel they are improving the world by not having kids. There’s a lot of merit to this choice, and I respect that decision. But likewise, a next generation is arguably still needed. And when raised with the right guidance and attitude they can be transformative and help reverse or at least negate some if the bad past generations have done to the world.

As others have said, it sounds like she’s getting too much sleep via daytime naps. Try waking her up from daytime naps before she naturally wakes up it you usually wake her up. It’s tough because she’ll be cranky and you’ll feel like you’re losing some valuable down time yourselves. But give it a try. I think you’ll find that she sleeps better through the night once you start limiting her daytime naps.

We have tried several reward systems, including rejigging the rewards and earning rules numerous times. But both us and the kids would frequently forget to award them. Then the kids would remember after 2 or 3 months and it would become a headache to try to assess.

So we’ve switched to debit cards with automatic allowance transfers. There’s also an option with the system we use to reward extra money for weekly chores, all done via the mobile app. It’s very convenient. Not least because the kids usually forget to do their chores, so they rarely earn the extra $s.

Additionally, the kids usually forget about their accounts/cards (despite frequently complaining when we say no to requests for treats or extra things). So their modest weekly allowances are gradually building up to a decent little nestegg.

But yeah, I hear ya about the concern about kids having debit cards too young. There has to be a certain level of financial awareness to really cope with them. Though the counterpoint to that is: such a mechanism helps get them to that better awareness.

Edit: fixed some autocorrect errors.

I’m running into something similar with one of my kids (who is around the same age as your daughter). He’s started throwing the term “bullying” around left, right and center.

Just at a sports game today he said the coach was bullying him. I literally watched the interaction 20 seconds before he said that, and the coach was telling him sternly that he needed to play in a certain position. He said it pretty nicely to. He just had to get stern because my son want listening. The way my son put it you’d have thought the coach was smacking him around and taunting him.

So my advice is to try to observe the interactions your daughter is having first hand. Because it’s possible she’s misreading it exaggerating them. And that’s a whole nother issue.