You do know that the threat of nuclear war is still being discussed right?

Our 20 months old definitely does not sleep a full night on her own for the record. She doesn’t feed but she does wake up screaming and refuse to go back to sleep unaided. She also sleeps at most 10 hours, usually about 9.

It’s decently reliable but it does log things I wouldn’t call sleep as sleep during the night

I’ve noticed that a lot lately

I’m not sure what I just witnessed but boy howdy did I not see the Bond villain lair stuff coming from checks notes “daddy’s little slut”

I figured that’s what you meant but I don’t think remote schooling is a good solution to that problem, unless the plan is to never be anywhere there are crowds since those are also a target for shooters.

However I do feel for you. I’ve more or less ruled out the US as a place to do a postdoc for among others this reason (the others being difficult to bring my dog, terrible access to childcare and healthcare and just generally the entire social welfare system being a nightmare). I’m much less worried about actual violence than I am about trauma from exposure to drills though.

What risks, precisely? I see lots of risks with online schools too. There’s a lot of evidence (example) from the acute COVID phase that remote and hybrid learning as implemented then has severe drawbacks for the majority of children, and I haven’t seen any concrete evidence to suggest that remote learning has any advantages besides being remote.

Mine is 22 months now and doesn’t really have interests yet, but I just realised we both like dog TikTok which gave me a much nicer morning than I’d otherwise have had.

Awesome. That happens to me too sometimes.

An interesting tidbit in that article is that the amount of unpaid housework families are doing to raise children seems to be increasing. I wonder what that is about?

This also fits my impression of home life, where there is simply too much work to do for two people, no matter how you split it.

I guess what’s happening developmentally is that they’re practicing having conversations and you can do that in form (I speak then you speak then) without having decipherable content down.

Yep, and also she’s there between 08:30-16:10 every day so quite a lot more than 15 h/week.

Ah, sorry, didn’t see the second bullet point. Yep, she’s one and nine months.

I checked now and we pay 1688 SEK / month, which I think is the maximum.

To add to what @victorz@lemmy.world was saying above, you usually also have the right to work fewer hours if you have as small child (unpaid), but I’m not sure about the caveats. I work 75% through that mechanism. In my case it’s not really a choice; if I’d work 100% like my wife too many chores wouldn’t get done. I also wouldn’t be able to do that on the amount of sleep and rest I’m getting (a few hours too few and almost none).

I should also add that you are explicitly only given subsidised childcare when doing paid wage work. You’re not allowed to for example pop in and do some shopping on the way to pick-up, which I presume most people do anyway from time to time because who is going to check.

This system is nice in the traditionally social democrat smoke stack sense of allowing you and everyone else the freedom to do paid wage work at the factory and very little else. With a more or less private system you’re paying for the service of “please take care of my children”, which means that the marginal cost of “please take care of my child for an extra hour while I talk to my wife/go shopping/clean at home” is huge by comparison, but what you get for that is a greater degree of equality and availability.

I write the last part mainly to work against the stereotype of Sweden as a socialist utopia; sure this is a socialist policy, but it’s a pretty boring one that’s very 1950s.

For smaller children there is heavily subsidised preschool (max monthly fee 1600 SEK or so where I live) that you have a right to if you are working (i.e. not on vacation), I think there is “fritids” for older children? It’s so far away for me that I haven’t looked into it, but AFAICT if your kids are not old enough to take care of themselves at home they are usually entitled to some sort of care.

I keep forgetting that childcare is generally unavailable, unaffordable, or both since where I’m from I’ve never heard of anyone unable to afford childcare.

It’s even funnier if you know I’m a trans woman rather early in my transition and that I do, in fact, just barely have boobs

Our 21-months old torpedo jumped my wife, who was quietly drinking tea in our sofa. Naturally, my wife did the only safe thing; a controlled spill of most of her tea on the side of the sofa that didn’t have the violence toddler attacking. Seeing this, said toddler commented “mommy spilled” and kept laughing like a maniac.

She’s also very fond of pulling out the top of whomever is holding her, shouting BOOOOB.

Today she also saw the sun in the morning after yesterday’s thunderstorm (it’s always bright outside here now as far as she knows since the sun sets long after her bedtime and rises long before she wakes up) and yelled “look! The lamp is on!”.

My first is one and a half and change now and after getting out of year one, which was absolute hell for me, I kind of understand where you are. I don’t feel exactly the same as you, but I do feel a lot more hope than I’d have expected.

My kid is a lot like @MagikShel’s youngest it sounds like, and she’s often extremely angry about my general existence, let alone any of my attempts at parenting her but in a way that comforts me because I see someone able to fight for what she wants at an early age and I’m very proud of that.