So I thought my toddler had to be potty-trained before the 3yr room and it turns out I misunderstood, and actually that room was focused on getting them trained. Maybe talk with them again not about the two-accident thing but about their process? Because I bet there’s something lost in translation. My kiddo’s 3yr room took them to the bathroom a lot and maybe the other kids doing it also had an impact.

I know exactly which toy dinosaur that was

That is my fear, honestly. He is a great fruit eater and a pretty decent veggie eater, especially compared to his peers. My once-skinny husband never was and he has definitely put on weight in adulthood (although I’m also not one to talk, but at least I eat fruits and veggies; I just also have an insatiable sweet tooth). He eats some junk food but I worry less about that when, if given the option, he’d likely choose salmon sushi and strawberries over almost anything else that might be offered.

She is a bit worried. She did say it’s good that he’s not losing weight. But she is concerned that he’s not gaining at a rate that is on pace with his height.

Ah awesome, I will try Costco. I might buy a small amount of the Pediasure to try it first and make sure he doesn’t balk. Condensed milk is a great idea! Does it change the flavor or texture at all? He’s picky about the texture of his beloved Kraft.

His doc did explain that she’s not worried that he’s skinny; it’s that he’s not gaining weight in pace with gaining height. She agrees that some kids are just skinny and that by itself is not a bad thing. Also, that this is a trend for my kid; she also said that kids can gain in bursts and maybe we’re just due for a burst, but this has been a convo at every appointment for…a while. At least three years.

We only buy whole milk for this reason! He does drink some sometimes but we might encourage it more regularly. He does have a tendency to get constipated though; sadly that seems to run in my side of the family. His doc worries that constipation will make him feel “full.”

He’s in martial arts, and likes it a lot. He goes 2-3 times per week typically, with the goal this year of closer to 3 on a regular basis, but we’ll see. Team sports have not had much appeal so far.

Absolutely! It’s a little tough when the “being loud and obnoxious” takes the form of whining, though… I have a hard time with that. Because I remember what it’s like to be a kid and be bored in a world tailored by and for grown-ups. But I’m also willing to adjust my behavior and expectations, like taking kids to kid-friendly restaurants that provide crayons or whatnot. Some parents do seem to be selfish and expect kids to just deal with it if they take them somewhere less suitable.

You’re not wrong. I actually made a comment a long time ago about this kind of thing… can I link it? It’s relevant!

https://lemmy.world/comment/8349243

I don’t know the best way to paste comments but hopefully that works.

My oldest is 10 and we’re just now starting to hear from him about the things his peers have/see/do. Up till now it’s been a non-issue. Also I don’t think most parents let their kids have free rein of the internet, especially not very little kids. Sure there are some, but I don’t think it’s the majority. A lot of parents now are millennials and we saw how fucked up Facebook made some of us and we hear all the time about how messed up teens are from social media so we’re pretty wary about what the internet is going to do to our kids.

That’s awesome, it’s probably way stronger this way too!

I have an 8yo and an almost 10yo. My 8yo has “big feelings” and has had a hard time making close friends at school. She had one last year that was mostly good, but they also clashed a lot and the other girl was constantly trying to distract my daughter in class, so they’re not in the same class next year. Learning in school doesn’t come as naturally to my daughter as other kids (including my son) and she has to work at it so the distraction is a real problem. We also think she is dyslexic — the school district “won’t label it” but will give accommodations based on assessment results and private tests are f-ing expensive. So we also have an (expensive) outside tutor to try to help her. It’s so hard. She’s so extroverted compared to everyone else in the family and struggles so much, and it’s hard to know how to help her without also burning ourselves or our son out.

Meanwhile my 10yo is the “easy” kid and just has attention issues, which he totally gets from his dad, but it doesn’t seem to line up with anything clinical so we’ve never bothered to get him tested. He’s just daydreamy. If he’s engaged, we have no issues.

I have said and continue to say that wouldn’t it be nice if both parents could work and support a household financially on 20-25 hours a week each? Both could have careers outside the home and have plenty of time for the rest of stuff, or one parent could choose to work more hours and the other (presumably) choose to be at home like they did in the 50s. But it wouldn’t have to be that way if jobs weren’t automatically 40+ hours.

Firstborn was “bird.” Second born was “mama.”

On the one hand, part of me thinks, take the twelve hours! My firstborn was a terrible sleeper and after that experience, sleep trumped all other concerns in our household.

However, one thing about said firstborn that I wish I’d had the experience to figure out sooner was that part of the reason he didn’t sleep was because he was very easily overstimulated. He had a very short window between fine and cranky, and if we missed it, sucked to be us. There were no cues. What we needed to do was not wait for cues, but we had no idea what we were doing. If she’s resisting, maybe try a bit earlier in the schedule, before she gets cranky?

Also, it’s worth checking with the doctor to see if they’d be worried about the 12 hour thing. If she’s eating well and staying on her charts, the doc may also tell you to enjoy your good sleeper.

Thirded! Also worked for us in a car seat.

My kids are older now but when they were young they liked:

Puffin Rock (Netflix in the US) - wholesome, family looking out for each other

Sarah and Duck (Amazon) - super low conflict, cute, very mild

Octonauts (Netflix I think?) - science-y adventure

We tried to get them into various PBS shows also. Daniel Tiger was okay, but now Bluey puts it to shame. They liked Dora for a while. We liked Molly of Denali but my husband is from Alaska so he had a soft spot for it. The older PBS shows are extremely formulaic which is attractive for a toddler but not for the parents.

We didn’t get Paw Patrol but it was kind of the forbidden fruit because of that, and whenever we were on vacation and the tv had cable, they wanted to watch it. But they also realized pretty fast that it was kind of boring. We stayed away from Peppa and Calliou because of what I’d read on Reddit.

This makes it sound like my kids watched a lot of tv! Probably too much to be honest but not as much as I’m making it sound.

Classic! The funny thing is, my daughter is not much of a skeptic, so I was kind of blown away! However, I do think she is extremely emotionally perceptive. My son is definitely more of the skeptic and would definitely say something like yours, lol.

My son did this, but he’s also the most chill kid and just kind of mentioned it the next day. He seemed pleased that he had figured it out, so I hope he wasn’t hiding true disappointment!

My daughter lost her first tooth at age six. The next morning, I went in to wake her up and she found her $5 under the pillow, at which point she looked me directly in the eyes and asked, “Mom, are you the tooth fairy?” Uhhh…… I think I gave her the standard cop-out parental response (“What do you think?”) but the cat was out of the bag.

I agree. My kids aren’t quite that old yet, but I’m wondering about speaking to my kiddo about the friend’s behavior that you noticed was particularly unhelpful, like not helping tidy up and getting ready to go. Of all of the issues, to me that one feels the most purely behavioral and not so much tied to who they are and possible insecurities. By having an honest but kind and patient discussion with my kid about how this was a problem, you can empower them to help you goad the friend into the behavior you need from them next time. It also helps your own kid possibly be aware of other issues, or even might bring up their feelings about said friend that they may already be having but haven’t processed yet. Or maybe they’ll tell you something about the friend that changes your perspective. Either way, peer pressure is way more effective that parental pressure at this age I’m guessing, so making your own kid an ally could be helpful.